Needin’ some Sweden

The route to see the fjords in Norway was incredibly complicated: bus to bus to train to train to ferry to bus to train to bus, and 16 hours later, to bed. The next day we had a very early train to Stockholm that left us with about 4 hours of sleep.

We were zombies when we arrived, but we lucked into a wonderful apartment in the south suburbs of Stockholm. We feel right at home in the quiet Douglas County of Sweden, with young professionals out jogging (more like shuffling) with their strollers. Our pace has also slowed down here, which is just what we needed before coming home.

While slower, there’s been no shortage of adventure in Stockholm. We saw Skansen, Europe’s first and best open-air folk museum, complete with moose and reindeer. The Vasa museum is absolutely incredible to see a 17th century ship recovered from the bottom of the Baltic Sea after sinking. Swedish meatballs at the hipster paradise Meatballs for the People, which is near a great record store. We also saw one of the coolest libraries in the world.

Perhaps best of all was Günter’s. It’s known for the greatest sausage in Stockholm, among the best I’ve ever had. It’s a small stand on the west side of town. We walked up and were immediately intimidated by the complicated menu with well over a dozen sausages, a long line of locals, and Günter who I don’t think speaks much English (or at least he doesn’t really want to). It was reminiscent of the Soup Nazi: order fast (preferably in Swedish), then get out of the way so the next person can order. He’ll tell you when you are allowed to pay, and then when he’s good and ready, he’ll call you up and hand you your food. Then leave.

While waiting in line, we heard a strange hiccup noise over and over. As we got closer, we saw the pack of guys right out of Moe’s Tavern in the Simpsons. Over 50, bald and unshaven, potbellied, and obnoxious. If hiccups could yell, this was it. There were belches, laughing, beers and sausages. I’m grateful they spoke Swedish only, one can only imagine. They were sitting right next to the stand being as disgusting as possible, then stumbled back to their classic convertible Cadillac (which, like them, had seen better days). Beers in hand and one on the dashboard, Hiccup looked like he was going to puke as he slumped in the passenger seat. His buddy in the backseat reached up and put his hands ever his eyes, as if somehow that would help keep the vomit in. The sausages were so good, we almost didn’t notice.

The kids named this the Stump of Pout 

We have a lake across the street, notice how thrilled two of the three are with this  

Moose at play (or Meeses?) 

 

Right out of Pirates of the Caribbean 

 

As you would expect, books in a circle  

 Günter’s favorite

Pining for the fjords

Only pics this time, because wow...

Flåmsbana train and cruise of Nærøyfjord in Norway.

Give peace a chance (and clean up the dog poop)

The Nobel Peace prize is awarded in Oslo each year at the Oslo City Hall, and there’s a museum devoted to the 133 winners across the street. Everything about it was interesting, but the kids were most impacted by the exhibit on the perils of climate change. Colorado’s 30% renewable energy standard seems silly when talking to a Norwegian about how they’re at 95%.

There’s also a museum to the Norwegian resistance to Nazi occupation during WWII. It’s much more James Bond than I expected, with fascinating undercover methods to communicate with each other and subvert the Germans.

A Viking Ship museum rounded out an overly-long stretch of visiting museums. The Vikings were big and mean, and they buried themselves with their ships when they died. After all these years, their ships still look pretty big and mean, the Vikings...not so much.

We also stumbled upon a clean city festival, complete with marching band and giant plastic dog poop on a stage. There was more giant plastic dog poop nearby. Clean up your poop, and bring your tuba too.

Walking up the roof of the Oslo Opera House is not as easy as it looks 

Pick the pooper

A guilty street pooper   

Oslo City Hall with many people in traditional Norwegian dress heading inside  

A climate warrior pose (wearing a future leader t-shirt)   

One can only hope to look as good as this Viking ship after 1200 years

Check your bread for secret messages. Maybe check the poop too. 

Something is rotten in the state of Denmark

It’s really wet in Scandinavia. That may be why everyone’s feet smell so rotten. Vikings were undoubtedly quite stinky too.

Before leaving Denmark, we squeezed in a trip to Helsingør. The castle at the tip of Denmark was the setting for Hamlet. Shakespeare never saw it. I’m about to have a high schooler who will now be that fact-checking kid who ruins English class. Was Shakespeare even the real author?

There’s also a great Maritime Museum, complete with a brilliant trade route activity that teaches you the fundamentals of global trade in the 18th century. The kids were squealing about how to get the best price on tea, sugar, and dyewood. I’m sad to say they were doing the same about the price of brandy and slaves, but at least they were excited about learning economics and history on vacation. I’m also sad to say that having an MBA does no good in high-seas trading.

The kids have always wanted to take a cruise, so that was our travel method from Copenhagen to Oslo through the night. Turns out, it’s a cheap cruise because it’s also the booze cruise for Danes who want to sit in their cabin listening to punk rock and yelling at each other all night while banging on the walls. 

We did, however, enjoy the couple who agonized over taking a picture on deck. The wife wanted a special pose of their hands together over their heads like a bridge - a bridge to their forever love. It was so endearing, until he couldn’t really figure out his camera-holding contraption and fiddled with it for 10 minutes before each attempt while she became increasingly impatient. And no one noticed his flimsy little tripod, and frequently walked in front of it while they were mid-pose. I’m pretty sure she wanted a divorce by the end of it.

Hamlet castle (supposedly)

Inspired by all the sailors, Dinah got her first tattoo

A virtual trading experience, how much is tea in China?    

Missing his little mermaid, Hans should have probably put on a swimsuit     

Captain of fun, bring on the Schnapps  

 

A recreation, easy if you just ask someone else to take the picture  

Daniel, like he is at every game, was dominant 

You have to Lego and have fun

Legos are fun to all ages. The birthplace of Lego is in Billund, Denmark, along with the original Legoland and the relatively new Lego House (see Netflix for a special on this). Having been to Legoland several times (see here and here), we opted for Lego House.

It’s floors full of fun, with games and activities throughout. There was building, laughing, and amazingly, no fighting. The staff clearly loves everything about their job. The two hour drive was a great way to see more of Denmark.

In other news, I’m really concerned about our night cruise to Oslo tomorrow, since a cabin for five cost the same as our tacos. Denmark is really expensive, so we may have just bought a pillow.

Dinosaurs don’t like stepping on those bricks either

Build a Lego car, race car, run around screaming, do it all again

A yellow submarine - all you need is love and Legos 

A giant Lego tree 

 

A rooftop to run around and scream on

 

Breaking records

The largest carillon in Northern Europe is at Our Savior’s Church in Copenhagen. So is one of the windiest towers to climb. Depending on the weather, it’s also the windiest. It’s 400 stairs to the top, with 150 being outside in the wind. It goes counterclockwise around the spire, leaving you dizzy and confused at the top. They closed it right before we went up because it had rained and the treacherous, narrow little steps are especially slick when wet. But since we were there, he said we could go on up, it would be fine. Daniel is still recovering from 17 stitches in his leg, but the views are supposed to be great up there and we never turn down a good tower climb, so up we went.

There’s also a little mermaid statue in Copenhagen that’s quite famous. It was crowded when we saw it and a bus full of Chinese tourists unloaded right as we left. Dinah commented, “I didn’t know they had a Chinatown here.” She doesn’t usually see a bus full of Chinese people and she’s never been to Chinatown, so I’m not sure what to do with this observation. The genetically modified little mermaid statue is way better and just down the road, and no one is falling over their selfie sticks to see it.

We also never turn down a good scam, so we bought tickets to the Guinness Book of World Records Museum. You’d expect to see really fat people, really tall people, and disgustingly long finger nails. You'd be right. 

Never one to turn down a good burger, the Gasoline Grill is reportedly one of the best in the world. That one checks out, best I’ve ever had.

The long and winding stairs

Wet stairs that could be a slide

     

A not so appealing photo of a famous place (note, selfie stick in photo, duck lips came immediately following)

 

An appealing photo of a not-so-famous place
 

His record is safe in spite of the best efforts of Gasoline Grill

Proof these stick figure drawings are based on reality

Cinco de Mayo es muy interesante en Copenhagen

It takes a few days to get in the groove of vacationing. We don’t often spend day and night all together all the time, that’s probably part of it. The Airbnbs we rent usually don’t have a place to escape when someone annoys you to the point of screaming or crying. Today was the day to figure it all out.

As with every Sunday, we started with church. The International Church of Copenhagen has a wonderful English-language service and a warm, welcoming congregation. The church brings together people from all over the world who share the English language. Hearing everyone say the Lord’s Prayer in their home language at the same time was an extraordinary global experience.

As with every Cinco de Mayo, we needed tacos. Hija de Sanchez is the place for tacos in Copenhagen. Ours were served with a side of bickering and grumbling, which came with us as we walked the city.

Stopping to smell the lilacs

Stopping to smell the tacos

Canals are funny    

Probably laughing at canals  

What is Hans Christian Anderson looking at?? 

Tourist, scooter, Mario pants