The Bruce (Born to Run)

For most of the trip, we haven't had to keep much of a schedule. But on our last day, we wanted to squeeze in a trip to Stirling Castle and give the kids another go at the bouncy wonderfulness of Wonder World, which meant we had to catch an earlier train to fit it in. We got up early enough, but somehow the morning got away from us and we had to run out the door to catch the train. Based on my experience, it’s easy to run when you don't have a backpack full of snacks and water bottles. I hear that makes it a lot harder. In spite of being weighed down, Jess was born to run – we made the train by seconds.

Stirling Castle was the setting for a few major historic events. Robert the Bruce fought the Battle of Bannockburn nearby (or was it Robert the Boss?). William Wallace of Braveheart fame also did some bloody things in the neighborhood. Mary Queen of Scots had her coronation there (or was it Mary Queen of Arkansas?). R.E.M. played some epic concerts there in 1999. It's an incredible setting, and the restoration was really done well. I'm glad we went.

William Wallace Monument, a killer view of a monument to quite the killer

Mostly what it probably maybe looked like back then

 

A room fit for a Queen. I think that little stool is for resting a backpack

  

Stirling Head, one of the original wood carvings that covered the ceiling

Great Hall, built in 1497 and restored marvelously 

I'm an art lover

European art museums, the place to sit and stare at paintings by Impressionists and elbow your way to catch a glimpse at a Monet. Or to wear a beret while pondering the Renaissance greats. I love Van Gogh and have enjoyed seeing his paintings at some of the major art museums in the world, but it’s not the first choice for these three kids. But put a special exhibit of comic book art in the same place, and it’s game on.

Frank Quitely is Scottish and an incredible comic book artist who’s worked on some minor characters like the X-Men and Batman. Oh, and he's worked on Superman. The exhibit at the Kelvingrove was amazing, with a first-hand look at the process from inception including pages from scripts from the writers that became some of the best selling graphic novels of all time. I guess there was other art in the museum too, but quite frankly I didn't see much past Frank Quitely.

Free museums in Glasgow are plentiful and great. A brief walk down the river Clyde brought us to the Riverside Museum full of transportation exhibits. We have a car crazy 8-year-old who was mostly happy with this, but quite frankly there could have been more cars. Like maybe a Batmobile.

No ink, looks good 

  

Inked and colored, looks great

       

Dinah, as her favorite "Woman Woman" 

    

Shorts worn outside my pants and no glasses = instant superhero

     

My friend Vinnie's painting of his Scottish roomie 

    

Salvadore Dali, the Christ of Saint John of the Cross 

 

This was my favorite frame in the entire museum, words making sound and motion 

  

From pictures on the wall to cars on the wall 

My passenger on this pretend bike doesn't seem impressed with the ride. Neither does the stuffed kitten on the handlebars

One hot minute

It remained cold for our last day in Edinburgh, and everyone felt good in their new coats. From a trip to Wonder World for some much-needed indoor running and playing for the kids, to a tour of the Scottish Parliament, the Queen’s palace at Holyrood House, and a hike up Calton Hill, we put some miles on the new coats and felt quite good about that purchase.

When we arrived in Glasgow, and checked into our lovely suburban home, Scottish weather continued to confound us. From freezing in blustering cold to sweating in brief flashes of sun, the answer seems to be stay inside or dress in layers.

The view from Calton Hill. Note, one in a t-shirt and two in the infamous Highland coats

    

Scotland's disgrace - it was meant to be another Parthenon, but they ran out of money and it remains like this

Thrilled to be in the Scottish Parliament

  

A four bedroom, three bath home in the suburbs of Glasgow

     

Glasgow Cathedral

 

Glasgow Cathedral, a view from the Necropolis 

   

The staircase to the top of the Lighthouse, the building designed by Charles Mackintosh  

 

The view is worth the climb

Doctor Who fans at the TARDIS. Like always, just left unattended on the street 

Found my coat and grabbed my hat, made the bus in seconds flat

To get to Loch Ness from Edinburgh, it's best to take the train to Inverness. Based on my shoddy research the night before, then it seems to make sense to take the bus to Urquhart Castle right on the shore to see some history rather than some silly sonar cruise through the Loch. For those of you unaware, that whole monster in the lake scheme was FAKE NEWS.

The problem with this plan is that the train takes about 3 ½ hours, and on the bank holiday, bus service is nowhere near as regular as it would be any other day that's not Christmas. The other problem is that the weather in the Highlands is considerably colder than Edinburgh, far colder in May than we could have possibly imagined while packing.

But there is good news: they sell coats in Inverness. But also more bad news: regarding that whole bus schedule thing, we had about ten minutes to see the castle otherwise we'd miss the train. Good news: the castle was free since we bought an explorer pass. Bad news: Dinah had to pee as soon as we got there, making 10 minutes more like 10 seconds for her and Jess. Good news: we got to the bus on time. Bad news: the bus was as hot as a sauna, making us sweat instantly in our cozy new coats. Good news: there's an international market right outside the bus station in Inverness that sells Romanian cream puffs that were made by angels. More good news: if you can't read the package, get the one with bacon on the wrapper - it's guaranteed to be good.

I hope you learned a good tip from this. Remember, bacon is always the one you want.

It really only takes 10 seconds to admire this

If boys had to pee, they would have just done it from here so as to not miss the view

The label says something about sent from heaven via Romania

As a bonus, it has zero smaku. And bacon

Picture yourself in a boat on a river

Her Majesty’s a pretty nice girl. If I had my Royal yacht taken away from me by the stingy Labour Party, I’m not sure I would have left it in such good shape - it would be hard not to make a royal mess of it.

Today we walked through Leith to visit Britannia. It’s parked right outside a shopping mall, which doesn't sound very appealing unless you walked over a mile with three kids to get there. In that instance, you welcome the convenient bathrooms and plentiful distractions that come with a good shopping mall. This one, in fact, won the Platinum ranking for the Cleanest Loo Award in 2015, and was still quite lovely.

Compared to modern cruise ships, I suppose the Britannia is a quaint little boat with fairly dated décor. But clearly in her heyday, this ship was a sight to see. Many a world leader no doubt got seasick on this beauty. U.S. Presidents included Dwight Eisenhower, Ronald Reagan, and Bill Clinton. Prince Charles and Princess Diana took a honeymoon cruise, and even moved in a queen-sized bed since all the others were singles, likely so they could play canasta at nighttime. Interestingly, the Queen did not sleep in a queen-sized bed, though perhaps any bed the Queen is in at the time is considered a queen-sized bed, sort of like any plane the President is on is Air Force One.

Other items of note:

In case a Royal yacht isn't interesting enough, there are stuffed Corgis placed throughout the yacht to find.

Leith has some great ethnic food. We found the most interesting and delicious Turkish Kebab anywhere in Europe so far. This place was called The Best Kebab. Most Kebab places seem to be named some variation on this (note, The Original Best Kebab is two doors down).

Really nice sitting area (in 1974)

A Corgi has been spotted! 

A wounded Corgi, perhaps a Canasta mishap 

Loo of the Year Awards is not a joke 

Best Kebab ever is not a joke, this was seriously the best I've ever had

The boy who lived

The first day of international travel is tough with three young children. Everyone is completely out of their routine, and no one has fully adjusted to the new time zone or gotten enough sleep. Any parent can tell you that a sleep-deprived kid is a crabby kid. Any kid can tell you that a sleep-deprived parent is a crabby parent. Shake those ingredients up with a day full of walking and sightseeing, and you get quite the experience.

In spite of that, we got through the most touristy of Edinburgh attractions, including the eponymous castle on the hill. Right outside Edinburgh Castle is a playground of tourist traps for young and old, including the Scotch Whisky Experience (think Disneyland ride in a whisky barrel) and Camera Obscura and World of Illusions (think house of mirrors on drugs). Through all of that, I'm pretty sure there was at least one person upset about something at all times. Complaints like, “But I didn't get to look through the crazy looking glass as long as she did!” and “I can't believe I actually paid for this!”rang out all day long. It was amazing everyone lived to see the end of the day.

No one should say someone slept like a baby, that implies screaming and pooping through the night. This family slept like the dead, and awoke to the right time zone and a fresh start where we no longer hated each other.

Step one for the new day was to conquer the National Museum of Scotland, a fabulous blend of nature, science and Scottish history. Dolly, the now-dead cloned sheep, is stuffed for everyone to marvel at a highly questionable scientific endeavor. The other animals are in cases mixed with fish, amphibians, reptiles and mammals within each case. Case by case, Daniel and I played “which would you like to have as a pet and which would you like in your bathtub.” The rules are pretty self-explanatory. The mammals usually won out as pets.

One of the boys who lived is a huge fan of Harry Potter. There are several other fans in this group as well. J.K. Rowling wrote the first book fueled by coffee at the Elephant House, just down from the street Potterrow (must be a coincidence). Behind the coffee shop is Greyfriars Kirkyard, a peaceful cemetery that's perfect for a quiet walk looking for inspiration where names like Riddle, McGonnagal, and Moodie can be found on gravestones (clearly another coincidence, there was also a John Campbell buried there). From over the cemetery wall sits the prep school George Heriot’s with four houses and four towers looking like a school of wizardry, and Edinburgh Castle is perched on the rock overlooking all of this looking like Hogwarts. Shake those ingredients up with a day full of typing, and you get quite the experience.

We ended with the Museum of Childhood, which you would expect to be full of fun toys. It's actually full of creepy dolls, which probably means that no one will sleep again.

"This is fine, I guess."

"I wonder if I can hit my sister with this cannon?"

One of the largest whisky collections in the world, but there ain't enough whisky in Scotland to make me forget you (or a bad day)

My kind of whisky

An optical illusion, or did his brother finally kill him?

That mischievous grin means trouble

My brother did this to me

People like coming to this place, must have good coffee!

Well, hello Dolly, you're lookin' swell, Dolly. It's really nice to have you back where you belong.

See, Tom Riddle is spelled wrong, no way this has anything to do with Harry Potter!

McGonagall is a common name, you see it everywhere 

A school for gifted kids, like maybe gifted with magic? 

Seriously creepy 

The boy who lived after eating haggis